


See The Stars That I Do

by TazWren



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Accidents, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Baby, Exes, F/M, HEA, Hospitals, Hurt/Comfort, Miscommunication, Pining
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-15
Updated: 2020-03-17
Packaged: 2021-02-28 20:40:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,102
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23153410
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TazWren/pseuds/TazWren
Summary: When Ben sees his ex-girlfriend with a baby that could only be his, he is desperate to make contact with her. Will he be able to unravel where it all went so wrong between them or is it too late?Or, break-ups, babies and miscommunication. Oy Vey!
Relationships: Armitage Hux/Rose Tico, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 46
Kudos: 169
Collections: Reylo Charity Anthology: Volume 2, Reylo Prompt Fills (@reylo_prompts)





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This was my first time writing for the Reylo Charity Anthology, and it's an honour to be part of this amazing effort that raised over $18000 for charity! 💙💙

It was a crisp spring afternoon, and the noises of the city seemed muted as the air in the park was filled instead with the sounds of children playing, birds chirping and the natter of people talking at their ease. As the willowy brunette strolled down the winding path, she spoke and sang softly to the occupant of the pram she was pushing. 

Stepping out of the dappled shadows and into the sun she paused, turning her face up and closing her eyes as she basked like a cat on a windowsill. At the sound of a gurgle, she grinned and cooed before reaching forward to fix a cap fallen askew. A pair of chubby, raised arms made a demand that she responded to by scooping the baby up and propping it on her hip while she brushed midnight-dark locks off a pale, round face. Pressing a quick kiss to a cheek damp with drool, she pulled the cap down firmly before she settled the child and continued on her way. 

Her attention caught between navigating the path and continuing her nonsensical conversation with the baby, she failed to notice the man standing stock-still on the bridge a short way away, staring from her to the baby and back again. Ahead of her, the path diverged and, as she turned down the fork that led away from the bridge, she also missed the way he was suddenly galvanized into action, chasing behind her. 

Fortunately, or unfortunately, he ran straight into a dog-walker and got his long legs thoroughly entangled in multiple leashes while the woman continued her walk, undisturbed. 

\---

“I'm telling you Phas, I saw her today—it was Rey, and she had a baby. _My_ baby.” Ben drove his hand through his already disheveled hair, tugging on the ends as he paced in agitation. “What do you mean, how do I know? That baby looked like me—the same hair, the same complexion. And it's been a year since we broke up.”

Pausing by the window, he listened as the phone squawked in his ear, the frown deepening while he stared blindly through the pane of glass. Then, shaking his head, his hand waving in negation to whatever he was being told, he interrupted, “No, no, I _need_ to know where she is, I need to see her. I know you know where she is, just _tell_ me.”

More squawking, through which Ben continued to shake his head. “No, don't tell me to leave her alone. I did that once already and it was the worst decision of my life!” Pressing a hand to the window, he leaned his head against it and entreated, “Please, Phasma… I have to do _something_.” 

Whether it was what he said, or the crack in his voice as he came close to losing his composure, it seemed to work. He straightened slowly as he gripped the phone and listened closely. “Yes! Hold on, let me grab a pen!”

He rushed over to the desk by the window, scrambled for a moment before his fingers closed around a pen and then he was writing down an address. Thanking Phasma, he disconnected the call and let the phone drop from his hand while he picked up the slip of paper and smoothed his thumb over what he’d just written down.

When he’d caught sight of Rey as he had cut through the park earlier that afternoon, Ben had slammed to a stop and stared and stared, unable to believe his eyes. To have not only seen her the first day he returned to the city in over a year but to have seen her cuddling a baby had sent a confusing mix of emotions arrowing through him. The most overwhelming had been an urgency to get to Rey, before he lost out on any more than he already had. 

Unbidden, another afternoon rose in front of his eyes, like a scene from a lifetime ago. Maybe it was.

_His fingers tangled in hers, their linked hands swing as they stroll through the very same park. He can’t help the smile that tugs at his lips as he listens to her talk, her free hand waving animatedly as she describes something. When she pauses and looks expectantly at him, he blushes and shakes his head rather than admit he’s been lost in the sound of her lilting voice—it holds a music he can listen to forever. Her grin says she sees right through him, though. She slows to a halt on the winding path, and after a quick glance around, she draws him off the path and into the sun-dappled shade of the ancient trees. There, she slips into his waiting arms, her lips searching for his in the green-tinted afternoon. They kiss, a gentle thing befitting the quiet mood they’re wrapped in, a sigh of contentment escaping her as he gathers her close._

\---

Standing in the street of what appeared to be a gentrified part of town, Ben looked up at the slightly ramshackle building and wondered if Phasma had given him the right address. Not that he had any choice but to take her word for it.

In the year he'd been gone, Rey had apparently not only changed her phone number but also where she lived. He supposed it was better than where she'd been before _—_ fiercely independent, she'd always resisted his suggestion that they move in together, insisting that she needed her own place. However, now with a baby, this didn't look like a very safe place.

Chewing on his lip, Ben suppressed the anxious fluttering in his stomach and walked up to the entrance. As he climbed the third flight of stairs, huffing slightly from the exertion and reminding himself that he did need to get back to a regular workout schedule, he heard the sound of heels rapidly descending towards him. Shifting in the narrow stairwell to move out of the way of whoever seemed to be in such a hurry, Ben slammed to a halt as the footsteps rounded the landing ahead of him. 

Rey.

A startled looking Rey, holding a wrapped bundle close to her chest. The baby, he assumed, a hand squeezing his heart as he looked mutely up at her. 

A Rey who tried to screech to a halt at the sight of him, her eyes widening in a way that would be comical if it were not for the absolute horror that transfigured her face as her foot missed the step and she slipped.

There was a moment of suspended animation in which their eyes caught, the air seeming to freeze around them, before she was pitching forward with a strangled yell.

Ben felt like he was moving through molasses, struggling to race up the stairs and catch them before they hit the steps. It felt like he could see every lost moment racing past him as Rey twisted to wrap herself around the bundle in her arms before she hit the stairs, just out of reach of his questing fingers. 

Her head crashed hard against the bannister on her way down and, as her eyes rolled up, her grip on the bundle slackened. Desperately, Ben grabbed for them, his heart clutching with fear. When the baby rolled into his arms, he let out the breath he’d been holding, even as he dropped to his knees on the stairs and blocked Rey’s falling body with his.

A piercing wail split the air as the baby in his arms protested the violent movements of the past minute. A minute, that was all that had passed from the time Rey had seen him for the first time in over a year, to when she lay unconscious against his legs.

Juggling the baby around so he could get a hand free, Ben ripped his phone from his pocket and frantically called for an ambulance. A panicked blur of time later, Ben watched the EMTs gently gather Rey and shift her out. He’d been warned not to move her so he’d remained frozen and terrified that he might injure her further if he did. The baby had continued to wail but he hadn’t dared move even to rock it, just trying to sooth it with his voice alone. 

When the EMTs explained that Rey only looked concussed, but they could only tell for sure after she was checked out and regained consciousness, he unfroze long enough to call Phasma and leave her a garbled message about stairs and babies and the hospital. 

\---

Loud crying pierced the fog surrounding Ben as he awkwardly juggled the baby in one arm, his other hand steadying its head like the EMTs had shown him. Sitting in the waiting area outside the private rooms in the hospital, he looked down at the bundle he held, his numbness fading as a warm protectiveness filled him at the sight of the scrunched up little face and a toothless mouth emitting sounds at volumes he would never have imagined from a little person. 

He knew next to nothing about babies but Ben decided, in that moment, that he was going to be the best damned father there ever was. He was a quick learner, and anything that his baby and Rey needed, he was going to do for them. Whatever had gone wrong between Rey and him, he needed to fix, because there was no way he was going to leave her to do this on her own.

As he looked down at his baby, a faint smile curving his lips, the doors to the waiting area burst open. He stared at the tall ginger-headed man who ran in, looking frantically around. When the baby in his arms wailed, the ginger whipped around in his direction.

“Paige!” the man exclaimed and hurried towards Ben and the baby with his arms outstretched.

Warily, Ben rose and held the baby away from the redhead. “Who are you?” 

The man frowned, his arms still raised towards the baby. “I'm her father! Please give her to me.” 

With a thump, Ben collapsed into the seat he'd just risen from, his thoughts whirling as he tried to make sense of what he was being told. Mutely, he looked down at the bundle he was cradling, feeling a pang as he realized just how much he had wanted the baby to have been his. And Rey's.

_Rey._

_And the ginger._

Abruptly another emotion eclipsed the sorrow he was feeling. He'd only been gone a _year_ and she'd not only moved on but also had a _baby_? How had he never been enough for that, before?

He didn't realize it but he was glaring up at the lanky man in front of him, ignoring his attempts to reach for the baby, and instead fixing him with a death stare.

Ben barely noticed another precipitous entry into the waiting room, a short Asian woman this time, who skidded to a halt in front of him with an inarticulate cry before she scooped the baby out of arms that he’d let loosen.

“Hey!” Ben exclaimed, looking from her to the other man and back.

“She's my wife,” the other man said, a little diffidently. 

His expression quickly morphed to alarm when Ben grabbed his collar and pulled him close to snarl in his face, “You're _married_ , you piece of shit? And you went and had a _baby_ with her?!”

The man shook his head frantically as he tried to pry himself out of Ben’s grip.

“Get your mitts off my Armie this instant or, so help me God, I will kick you so hard you'll spit your balls out!” the woman hissed furiously, shoving herself in Ben's face, even as she held the baby angled carefully away from him. 

Then, other hands were grabbing him and pulling him away and shoving him back, even as he growled in protest.

“Jesus, Solo! Calm down! Are you trying to get thrown out of here?” Phasma barked at him, restraining him while the other couple retreated to another set of chairs, throwing dirty looks at him the whole time. As his eyes went from face to face, for the first time absorbing the sight of the three of them together as a unit, a realization dawned.

Paige wasn't Rey's and his baby, after all. 

\---


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for the love this story is getting! I'd planned on writing a comedy of errors, but ended up with something angsty-ass instead. Shows how much I know! 😁💙

_Paige wasn't Rey's and his baby, after all._

Maybe it has been wishful thinking, but suddenly his arms felt emptier than after the baby had been taken from him. An overwhelming sense of loss washed through him, before it was chased by the burn of anger.

Ben let himself be pulled back, dropping in the seat he’d just recently vacated, before he turned to hiss at Phasma, "You knew the baby wasn't mine, wasn't _Rey's_! Why did you let me believe it was?" 

She leveled a calm look at him, not in the least bit affected by his bristling. “Where’s Rey? How is she? What the hell happened?” she asked, ignoring his question and effectively dissipating his anger as he remembered what was really important in the moment.

He scrubbed a hand tiredly over his face before motioning to the door to the private room. “She’s in there—they checked her out downstairs and said she needed to be admitted since she was unconscious.” At the strangled noise she made, Ben laid a hand over Phasma’s. “She slipped and fell down the stairs. I was able to catch her, and the baby, but not before she hit her head hard on the way down. They seem to think she’ll be okay, but she needs to wake up first.” 

His voice was quiet as he gave her the facts of the matter. He tried to say it as simply as possible, ignoring the little throb of fear at recalling Rey’s sickening pitch down the stairs towards him.

Phasma made to rise but he stopped her. “No one’s allowed to go in until the doctor checks her again. That’s why I’ve been sitting out here.” 

She sighed and nodded, before leaning back in her seat, extracting her hand from under Ben’s.

He searched her face. “Why did you let me think it was our baby? You knew I had it wrong.”

"And I owed you that exactly why? After the way you left my sister? I only gave you the address because—" She pressed her lips together and looked away from him.

"Because? Because _what_ ? If this is how you feel, why _did_ you tell me where to find her?" Ben leaned forward, pinning her with a look.

"Because of how miserable she's been! I thought she deserved the chance to… to scream at you in person instead of bottling it up inside her, like she's been!" Phasma threw her hands up and glared at him. "You know? So she can finally have some closure?"

A part of Ben jolted to hear that Rey had been miserable, that she actually even _cared_ that they were no longer together. There was a flutter of something almost like hope. Then he frowned. 

“Wait, to scream at me? What the hell for?” Agitated, he got up to pace in front of Phasma, jabbing at his palm with his pointer finger as he counted off. “She’s the one who ghosted me, not talking, not taking my calls, not returning my messages, and _she’s_ miserable? What about me? When she knew I was going to be gone, when I’d _told_ her I only had a few weeks before I had to leave?” 

“That’s just it!” Phasma sprang out of her chair, forcing him to halt or mow into her. She poked a finger in his chest, making him blink and take a step back. “You _told_ her. You were always telling her. To do this or do that. Did you ever _ask_ her? Even once? Did you consult her before making your decisions? You knew she grew up in the system, you _knew_ her fear of abandonment, and what did you do? Upped and left, didn’t you?” 

The anger in her voice washed over him, snapping him out of his own as her words made sense.

Ben’s heart sank.

“Why didn’t she tell me how she felt?” he asked, weakly, the fight having drained out of him as he saw the past year and more through different eyes.

“She shouldn’t have had to, Solo. You were supposed to have been with her, been there for her. But you weren’t paying attention. Rey deserves better than that.” Phasma shook her head, wearily, before turning to step away.

“Phasma, wait.” He put a hand on her arm, speaking urgently, “You’re right, you’re right—I should have known, I should have done better. But I—” Ben waved a hand helplessly. “This past year? It’s been hell, thinking the whole time that she’s done with me, that she didn’t even care enough to talk to me once. Not once.”

She sighed and looked at him for a long moment before nodding at the drink dispenser. “You want some coffee? I could sure use something.”

\---

Coffees in hand, they settled back in the chairs. Across from them, the baby had gone to sleep in the arms of her mother, while her father hovered protectively, casting occasional glances at Ben with a faint frown on his face.

 _Not that I can blame him,_ Ben thought as shame washed over him, remembering his earlier behaviour towards the man. Not for the first time, he felt a pang at the memory of the baby he’d held for all too brief a period. If he’d been asked he would never have said he was ready to have a baby. But having seen Rey cradling the child, having carried its wiggling weight himself, Ben was not too sure he would say no. All those nights he’d spent looking up at the stars, while half a world away from Rey, trying to imagine how she was, if she missed him, or even _wanted him_ as much as he still did her—it had been the hardest when he'd let himself get drunk and thought about all the things he’d wanted for them, for Rey. With Rey. And yet, he’d let himself remain stubbornly proud about not contacting her until she reached out first. 

With a sigh, Ben leaned forward and stared into the cup of sludgy coffee, like its murky depths held the key to what he needed to do next.

“Excuse me, you’re Ben aren’t you?” A pair of booted feet stepped into his line of sight, making Ben sit up. The red-headed man had walked over to him, leaving his wife who was absently rocking the baby while looking at him, an inscrutable expression on her face.

Warily, Ben nodded. The man stuck his hand out, making Ben flinch slightly. 

“I’m Hux. Wanted to say thank you for taking care of Paige.” As Ben slowly gripped the hand offered for him to shake, the ginger grinned, wryly. “You’re not what I’d expected.”

“What?” Ben blinked owlishly.

“From what Rey’s been saying about you.”

“She’s been talking about me? To you? Why?” Coffee forgotten, Ben leaned forward, his eyes intent.

“Because we’re her friends and we care about her. Not that you would understand,” Hux’s wife called out, sharply, now openly glaring at him.

“Easy, Rose,” her husband said, raising a placating hand in her direction, “There are always two sides to every story. Plus...” Hux raised a meaningful eyebrow in the baby’s direction.

“He was attacking you! Why are you taking his side?” Her whisper was no less caustic for the reduction in volume.

Ben winced, rubbing at the back of his neck with a broad palm, “I’m sorry, man—that was out of line. I thought… you know…”

Hux nodded, “I know, and I may have done the same if I thought someone had been playing around with Rose.” Ignoring his wife’s scoffing, he went on, “That’s what I meant—you clearly care about her, but that’s not what Rey seems to think.” 

"Of course, I care about her!" Ben gritted out, tired of people assuming that he didn't.

"Really? When did you last tell Rey that? Oh, wait, while dumping her?” The diminutive woman asked him, with an arched eyebrow. 

Ben frowned in confusion—he’d originally thought her vehemence had to do with him manhandling her husband. But this…

“Who are you, exactly? And why is Rey telling you things about me? What is she, your babysitter?” He challenged in turn, even while his heart sank, recognizing that she might have a point. He’d never been good with words, and Rey had never _seemed_ to need him to prove his love. He thought he’d been showing her, every time he held her, every time he kissed her, tried to do something for her. Evidently, it hadn’t been enough.

Phasma, who’d been quietly watching the exchange till then, leaned forward and nodded towards Hux and his wife. “Rose and Hux—they run the dojo that Rey now goes to and are pretty tight with her. I pushed Rey to start doing something about all the negative energy in her after… well.” She looked meaningfully at him, before shaking her head. 

“How the hell did you fuck up so badly, Solo? Anyone looking at you can tell how gone you are for her. How could you let this happen?”

Ben growled in frustration, making Phasma raise a cool eyebrow at him. “Listen, I _don’t_ know okay. She wouldn’t even talk to me, how am I supposed to know _what_ she was thinking?”

“Oh, please,” Rose scoffed, “She tried calling you after that message you sent her. Seriously, who breaks up over a text?!” Hux grimaced apologetically when Ben looked up at him, incredulous. 

“After? _After_ I sent her the text? After I’d left the fucking country and my number no longer worked? After I tried calling her, texting her for two fucking weeks before I had to fly out?” His voice rose, as he did, unable to sit still any longer. Rose blinked and drew back, looking uncertain for the first time. 

Hux laid a hand on Ben’s shoulder, whether to placate him or to keep him from charging Rose he didn’t know. 

Behind him Phasma asked “What are you saying? She didn’t respond to anything before then?”

“No.” Ben spat out, turning to face her, spreading his hands. “What was I supposed to think?”

“Shit.” Phasma rolled her lips and looked towards the door leading to the room Rey was in. 

Grimacing, she looked up at Ben. “Shit, I’m sorry… that’s not what I assumed had happened. When she called me and I went to get her, she looked like she’d been weeping her eyes out and she claimed you were leaving her. A few days later, she broke her phone, but I thought that she got it fixed.”

Ben stared at Rey’s foster sister, but was saved from having to respond, to _think,_ when a doctor walked into Rey’s room, trailed by a nurse. He moved to follow them, but was halted by the nurse’s raised hand. 

“Please wait a moment, sir. Let the doctor finish and then we’ll let you know if you can go in.”

The wait that followed seemed interminable as Ben worried at his lips, his jaw working as he tried not to fidget as the minutes ticked by. By his side, he was absently aware of Phasma having stood to join him, as had Hux and Rose. Oddly, it made him feel not so alone. 

When the doctor stepped out, looking up from the chart in her hand, he held his breath. “Which one of you is Ben?” She looked from him to Hux. 

Loosing the air he’d trapped, Ben stepped forward, inanely raising his hand as he did. “Me… I’m Ben. Is she okay? Is she awake?” The words rushed out of him.

With a faint smile, the doctor nodded. “Yes, she’s awake now, and asked if you were here. She isn’t badly concussed even though she seems to have taken a nasty crack to the head. No broken bones, but we will be keeping her overnight for observation. You can go in and see her, but please keep it brief, she won’t stay up long with these medicines.” Turning to the nurse, the doctor handed her the chart and issued some murmured instructions, pointing to something on the sheet as she did.

Suddenly feeling unsure, Ben glanced at the others. When Phasma nodded, he took a fortifying breath and stepped into the room.

\---

**Author's Note:**

> Big love 
> 
> to [Ferasha](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ferasha/pseuds/Ferasha), [Trish47](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Trish47/pseuds/Trish47) and [Littlemistake](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Littlemistake/pseuds/Littlemistake) for editing this,
> 
> to [Celia](https://archiveofourown.org/users/crossingwinter/pseuds/crossingwinter), [Yam](https://yamstrange.tumblr.com/) and [Jeeno](https://archiveofourown.org/users/jeeno2/pseuds/jeeno2) for running this anthology and pulling this massive effort together. 
> 
> 💙
> 
> 25.Oct.20: Hey, thank you so much for reading and I just wanted to say, I fully intend to finish writing this fic and all my others. 2020 has been spectacular in turning our world on its head, and I hope to get back to writing soon. 💙


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